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Anal Play: Getting Into The Right Frame of Mind

access_time Last updated August. 03, 2017  Anal Play Advice
Anal play begins by getting into the right frame of mind - Learn our 5 principles to great anal sex

When it comes to anal play, it’s essential that your body, heart, and mind are on the same page. Stress, worry, and pressure can play a big part, so here are 5 best anal play practices to help you get in the right frame of mind.

Don’t Get Goal Orientated During Anal Play

Speaking of pressure, people often think that anal is the final goal. It can be so easy to get focused on anal intercourse that you actually make it more difficult to enjoy the experience. If you go too quickly, the body will tighten up. It’s a reflex and it isn’t something you can tell someone to change. That would be like telling someone to not blink when they look at a bright light after being in a dark room.

The best way to enjoy anal play is to be open to the many different pleasures and experiences you can have. If you think that success only means anal intercourse, you’re more likely to create pressure. That usually makes things a lot less fun.

The important thing is to shift away from being goal-oriented and become pleasure-oriented. If success means that you and your partner have smiles on your faces, then it doesn’t matter how you get there. That gives you a lot more options for having a great time. It also takes the pressure off. Ironically, that can sometimes be the key ingredient that makes anal intercourse work better.

Anal Play 101: Don’t Copy Porn

While erotic movies and porn can be inspiring and arousing, they usually don’t show the most realistic versions of sex. Erotic movies are designed to turn on the viewer, which is why you rarely see the boring parts such as warm up or applying lubricant for anal sex. It’s not that it doesn’t happen. The performers are professionals who have had years of practice to prepare their body before they step in front of the camera.

The fact is that porn isn’t accurate when you consider how most people enjoy sex, anal or otherwise. The less sexy parts like anal prep and hygiene are often overlooked and what that means is that if you do try to copy what you see on screen, you’re likely to hurt yourself or your partner.

If you do enjoy porn and feel the need to emulate it, go ahead, but be sure to take the necessary precautions to make anal play feel good.

Think Outside The Box

As mentioned above, most people think of anal sex as anal intercourse. But there are lots of other fun ways to experience anal pleasure. At b-Vibe, when we talk about anal sex, anal play, or anal pleasure, we’re talking about anal erotic anal touch.

That might mean tickling around the outside of the anus with a finger during oral sex. It might mean using one of our amazing toys. It might mean sliding a finger in during rear-entry intercourse. It might mean rimming (oral stimulation of the anus). It might mean using a vibrator around the outside while you masturbate. Anal intercourse can be amazing fun, but it’s only one option within the larger category of anal play.

When you think of anal sex as having more options, you give yourself more ways to enjoy it. That can take a lot of the pressure off and make it more fun.

Make Anal Play A Side Dish

If you’re new to anal play, you might find that it works better if you add it on to something you already enjoy. That helps your body associate the familiar pleasures of sex with the new sensations. Feel free to use your hands or a vibrator to stimulate your genitals rather than focusing entirely on anal stimulation.

You might find that you reach a point where you enjoy anal pleasure on its own, but maybe not. There are plenty of anal enthusiasts who find that they have a better time when it’s a side dish rather than the main course. That doesn’t mean anything except that it’s how their bodies work.

The Rimming Plug is a perfect way to add a little anal adventure to whatever other fun you have planned. Try it solo. Try it during oral sex or intercourse. Try it during an erotic massage. There’s really no limit to how you can include it in your pleasure.

Go Slow and Slippery During Anal Play

It can be difficult to take it slow when you’re turned on. But most people discover that when they do, anal play feels much, much better. That’s for two reasons. First, when you slow down, you let your body stay more relaxed. That helps you not tighten up. Second, the anus is amazingly sensitive.

Slowing down lets you experience all of the different pleasures and sensations, so it feels better. It’s worth taking a little extra time, especially when you’re new to this kind of sex. It makes it more fun, and it makes it easier.

If you think you’re going slow enough, try slowing down even more.

And that wraps up our 5 top tips for anal play and getting into the right frame of mind. What would you add?

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